On Turning 29

On Turning 29
Just my age.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Forced Tips or I HATE TIPPING!

Tipping! I really hate to tip. To me tipping is such a pointless endeavor. I mean, their has to have been a time when tipping was optional and not forced or coerced like it is today. I mean we tip for everything these days. We tip for taxis, servers, bartenders. The worst part is the higher the bill the higher the tip. Why? I mean it should  be an option to tip, and please don’t get me started on those places that charge you a mandatory gratuity.

When we have to tip taxi drivers, they are the ones I feel tipping is okay. These are a bunch of guys who drive around all night to all kinds of neighborhoods, picking up all kinds of strangers and weirdos, who knows if their next fare is going to be a psychotic person with a gun or a knife. Another thing that these guys have to worry about is getting robbed or having one of their fares run away like in that movie “The Pursuit of Happyness”. My point is that these guys and gals really take a risk when they pick you up and so they merit a tip. However with all that being said, their prices are fucking ridiculous. Fucking .50 every one tenth of a mile. For that price their it better be a fucking limo.

Waitresses and waiters are a group of people in this society, that we are required to tip. I don’t like having to tip a waitress, I do it, but I don’t like it. The reason why I don’t like is, because sometimes, well most times, waitresses kind of suck. Especially if you go to am empty restaurant. When it’s you and the server and you order your food, she or he doesn’t really bust his or her ass. They may have to walk to your table and ask you if you are doing well, and if you would like anything. By doing that, they are basically doing their job and why should one tip when someone is doing their job.

Now here comes the problem. I had heard that a lot of places pay waitresses low wages, as in below minimum wage and they supplement their earnings with money that they get from their tips. My question why can’t employers just pay their waiters and waitresses a decent wage so we don’t have to tip an extra five or six dollars. I mean who decided that rule or this stupid ass custom.

People who work at McDonalds or Burger King work about six times harder then any waiter or waitress out there and we are not expected and do not tip them. I mean in a fast food place, I have experience working at one, you are required to get any order, no matter how big within a minute and forty seconds. Be it one cheeseburger and a drink or six Big Macs and fries and drinks. The people who work at fast food places are just as hard working as waiters and waitresses, but we don’t have this big guilt inducing need to tip them like we do with people who work in so called higher class restaurants like Dennys.

The worst and I mean the worst group to give tips to are bartenders. I fucking hate tipping bartenders. What is the fucking point? They don’t do anything special. They take a glass, put some ice in it, grab a bottle, pour into a cup and then another liquid into a cup and then hand it to you. It takes fucking 20 seconds. I mean its worse if you order a beer, from a tap or a bottle. Bartenders do absolutely nothing for their patrons but take their money.

Granted sometimes the bartenders are women and they are dresses sexy, but other then that, what? I mean at strip clubs, I understand tipping. Tipping to get the dancers attention so they will rub their boobs or cooch in your face and I can understand. I hate strip clubs* and they are not my cup of tea, but I understand them. If I was in the mood to have a strangers privates in my face, then I would happily tip. But I don’t dig that stuff.

It would be nice if the female bartenders served their drinks naked or with just panties on. But if all they are showing is cleavage, I would rather keep my money. Tipping bartenders is a really fucking stupid endeavor. I mean they don’t do anything. Maybe you are thinking:

“Oh but they listen to you and your problems and are nice.”

No, not really. I had, up until this past weekend, been going to bars and the same bar for almost 2 months. I had spoken with some of the bartenders there, and I was talking with them and I could tell when  people were being fake and not really listening to me. Being fake is another entry which is coming soon as well. My point is this, how do we know someone is really listening to you, when their whole job is taking as much money from you as possible. It’s like when some of those guys tell you that the only people who really understand are strippers, cause they “listen” they do not.


Like Mr. Pink, from Reservoir Dogs says:

“I’m very sorry the government taxes their tips, that’s fucked up. That ain’t my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Look if you ask me to sign something that says the government shouldn’t do that, I’ll sign it, put it to a vote, I’ll vote for it, but what I won’t do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit I got two words for that: learn to fuckin’ type, ‘cause if you’re expecting me to help out with the rent you’re in for a big fuckin’ surprise.” 


I feel the same way, I just hate that it is forced and expected. One time I had a Thai woman yell at me for not leaving a tip because we had forgotten to, BY ACCIDENT!

In South Korea and China, you never have to tip anyone for anything and that rocks

It sucks that we have to give tips. More ways people take your money.

I hate tipping.

*please note that the deep throat queen porn star KATSUNI is coming to the Crazy Horse in August. It’s a strip joint, so I may have to break my rule.

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